Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
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