hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
Randomize
