I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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