He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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