Have you finally orgasmed yet?
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Randomize
