You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
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