Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
