She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
She bit a glass in half.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Randomize
