can you have the cops turn on the gps locator on my phone...i just woke up in a Hooters uniform and I have no idea where I am...
I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
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