Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
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