Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
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