I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
Randomize
