i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Randomize
