either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
lets start a swedish sibling band together
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
The adults are the big ones right?
Randomize
