Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Randomize
