All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
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