I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
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