God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Randomize
