just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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