She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
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