the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
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