Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize