Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Randomize
