Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Randomize
