wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
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