that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
