well most of my day revolves around power hour
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
Randomize
