OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
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