Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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