he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Randomize
