Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I need help removing her.
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize
