i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
Randomize
