We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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