she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
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