and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
Randomize
