I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
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