Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
