So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize
