That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
