well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
I have already put on my inside pants.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize