We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
Randomize
