I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
