You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Randomize
