let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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