He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
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