You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Randomize
