why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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