bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
you told grandpa to call you daddy
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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