So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
