dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Randomize
