So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
